A Message to Grief

Nov 27, 2016

My mother passed away on August 7th of this year.

Just typing that is surreal.

It is by far the most difficult thing I have ever gone (and am going) through.  I thought I was doing “okay”, but then Thanksgiving came and boy was I taken by surprise by the new level of grief that has hit. So, in trying to wrap my head around it all and the degree of crazy that I can sometimes feel, I wrote a message to my grief. It helped.

If you are currently mourning the loss of a loved one, and experiencing the emotional roller coaster that it can bring, I hope this will help to bring you to a place of peace. I also want to encourage you to find a grief support group in your area. Grief is hard, but it is necessary. Let the tears cleanse your soul. Trust in the knowing that God is with you and will guide you through it. Also, be mindful of the enemy. I have learned over the last few days that he will often disguise himself as grief.  He wishes for you to not heal and is very content to keep you down; robbing you of the current joys that surround you. My prayer is you will recognize and rebuke him in those times.

Peace to you,




I’ve met you before; but only in passing.

I’ve watched you take residence in someone’s heart; and

have offered my prayers, my kisses, my hugs –

all in an attempt to help remove you from that place.

Then,  I have

shaken your hand;

bid you farewell; and

walked away –

leaving you behind, but with the knowing that I would see you again.

For as long as there is death and loss, you also will exist.

But, you’ve come too soon, my bittersweet friend;

And this time it is mine whose heart you have entered,

Serving as a constant reminder to me that the loss which preceded your arrival is, in fact — real.

You rear your head at unexpected moments, demanding to be acknowledged and refusing

to allow me to live in a fantasy world of denial.

You cast a shadow of darkness in my day.

A shadow that creates a sorrow like none other I have known.

Still, it is in this place where my Lord and Savior meets me.

He reminds me that had I not loved first, you could not find me.

He provides me the strength to embrace you rather than ignore you; and

Bids me to “be still” as He captures all my tears.

It is in this reality where He stays with me,

And where ultimately, through His light I see all the goodness;

hope; and

beauty that remain –

Not only in today, but eternally.

For at the right time, you will be gone;

But He, along with His promises, will never leave me –

And this, dear grief, is the how and the why I press on.



Hopes and Dreams

“Don’t quench the dreams and visions the Spirit puts inside of you. Human nature is to subdue our hopes in order to protect ourselves from disappointment, but God gives longings and hopes in order to fulfill them. Jesus’ promise applied not only to a few apostles but to all who would read His Word. The God who knows the future will lead you into yours be giving you glimpses of it. Notice them and follow His lead.”


Prayer: “Spirit of God, You know my future and how it fits with your Kingdom plans. Please show me enough to draw me into Your purposes. Give me God-sized visions that we can fulfill together.”

As written in Experiencing God’s Presence; Chris Tiegreen.

When Your Anxiety Has Anxiety

Turning the Page

Okay, so I don’t really know if it’s possible for your anxiety to have anxiety, but the point is that sometimes anxiety hits, and it hits hard.  

In the past, I probably wouldn’t have admitted that anxiety is something that I struggle with, partly because I wasn’t fully aware of this struggle, and partly because I can be prideful.  I don’t like to admit that I’m weak, that I need help.  But here I am admitting to you that I am WEAK, that I am in desperate need of the Lord’s help.

Anxiety and fear are rooted in lack of trust.  The anxiety that creeps into my heart, anxiety about different areas of my life, along with the fears that pop up, demonstrate my lack of trust in the Lord, in His plan and purposes that are far greater than any plan and purpose of man.

We are not merely advised

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As He Speaks to me; May He Speak to you


This past week the Lord, knowing all of my struggles – the greatest being the unexpected passing of my mother 7 weeks ago – has been impressing Psalm 23 upon me. Specifically, I have heard the His Spirit speak verse 1 : “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.”

Today, at the encouragement of my husband, Michael, I sat out back sitting in silence. The purpose: to de-clutter my mind and JUST BE WITH GOD.

Thirty minutes into this exercise, He impressed Psalm 23 on me again. This time, I pulled out my bible and read the entire Psalm. He prompted me to write out a more simplified version and to take the words He was giving me and recite them out loud as a reminder of the declarations contained within them. He wanted me claim them; because through Him they are mine to be claimed. So, I did;  and should you wish to claim them too, here they are:

The Lord

cares for me

– provides for me

– guides me

– protects me

I do not want for anything, because [in Him] I do not lack anything.

Rest and Peace are found in Him.

My Spirit and Soul are fed through Him.

He quenches any thirst I have.

Through my obedience, in Jesus’ name, He leads me in the direction I should go.

Even in the most difficult times, when the noise of the world; self; and evil are deafening, I can trust Him fully; and be rid of all fears.

I am invited to His table EVERY DAY – to taste and experience the endless richness of what His grace and mercy serves–

Not only in this life, but for all of eternity.


How beautiful of a reminder is that?

May you memorize this and keep it close.

God Bless You All. ❤



Declare Who You Are

I once heard a message that Andy Stanley gave about comparing ourselves to others. The main point of his message that stuck with me was “There is no win in comparison.” Isn’t that the truth? Still, it can be challenging to not re-visit the comparison carousel; especially in this era of social media where the majority of posts we see would appear as though everyone around us is living a Norman Rockwell or Leave it to Beaver life. For the record: they’re not.

If you find yourself struggling in this area, make a copy of the declaration below. Keep it handy and read it over and over until you have freed yourself of this joy zapping craziness. The Creator of Universe made YOU just as you are for a reason; and He doesn’t make mistakes.


I am a person.

I am not a machine, spreadsheet, agenda or résumé.

I have a heartbeat, skin, scars and a soul.

I am a person.

My worth isn’t calculated in efficiencies, results or ladders climbed. I am not the sum of my accomplishments — or the sum of my mistakes. I am not my ambition, energy level, approval rating, mass appeal or worth to the company store. I am not an A-plus or D-minus. I am not a mess or a miscalculation.

I am not a mistake. Rather, I am a miracle. And so are you.

Because I am a person, made of love in the hands of God.

I will be a person today. I will be me. I will resist the urge to believe I’ve got to fight for my piece; God says there’s more than enough to go around.

I will see the best in others and recognize the best in myself.

I will reach for virtue more than trophies, dignity more than stardom. I will choose encouragement over envy. I will rejoice with those who rejoice.

I will stand tall on the inside, even if I’m feeling weak on the outside.

I am a person, a citizen of the Kingdom, where there is unending grace for me. Because I am a person, and I belong to Jesus.

as written by Jennifer Dukes Lee.

“Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else” Galatians 6:4