A Message to Grief

Nov 27, 2016

My mother passed away on August 7th of this year.

Just typing that is surreal.

It is by far the most difficult thing I have ever gone (and am going) through.  I thought I was doing “okay”, but then Thanksgiving came and boy was I taken by surprise by the new level of grief that has hit. So, in trying to wrap my head around it all and the degree of crazy that I can sometimes feel, I wrote a message to my grief. It helped.

If you are currently mourning the loss of a loved one, and experiencing the emotional roller coaster that it can bring, I hope this will help to bring you to a place of peace. I also want to encourage you to find a grief support group in your area. Grief is hard, but it is necessary. Let the tears cleanse your soul. Trust in the knowing that God is with you and will guide you through it. Also, be mindful of the enemy. I have learned over the last few days that he will often disguise himself as grief.  He wishes for you to not heal and is very content to keep you down; robbing you of the current joys that surround you. My prayer is you will recognize and rebuke him in those times.

Peace to you,




I’ve met you before; but only in passing.

I’ve watched you take residence in someone’s heart; and

have offered my prayers, my kisses, my hugs –

all in an attempt to help remove you from that place.

Then,  I have

shaken your hand;

bid you farewell; and

walked away –

leaving you behind, but with the knowing that I would see you again.

For as long as there is death and loss, you also will exist.

But, you’ve come too soon, my bittersweet friend;

And this time it is mine whose heart you have entered,

Serving as a constant reminder to me that the loss which preceded your arrival is, in fact — real.

You rear your head at unexpected moments, demanding to be acknowledged and refusing

to allow me to live in a fantasy world of denial.

You cast a shadow of darkness in my day.

A shadow that creates a sorrow like none other I have known.

Still, it is in this place where my Lord and Savior meets me.

He reminds me that had I not loved first, you could not find me.

He provides me the strength to embrace you rather than ignore you; and

Bids me to “be still” as He captures all my tears.

It is in this reality where He stays with me,

And where ultimately, through His light I see all the goodness;

hope; and

beauty that remain –

Not only in today, but eternally.

For at the right time, you will be gone;

But He, along with His promises, will never leave me –

And this, dear grief, is the how and the why I press on.



4 thoughts on “A Message to Grief

  1. Andrea

    Just beautiful Carol and it brings to light the feeling that each of us have inside when we have lost someone we loved . Thank you for sharing your beautiful letter/ poem with me . It couldn’t have come at a better time my dear sister in Christ !


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